You've made me proud.....
Posted by Zoe's Dad at Monday, February 18, 2008 2:11 AM and is filed under piano recitals,Redemption,Piano lessons,Mistakes 
She looked up and forced a smile, half of a smile, really for what she would have preferred were tears. I saw it in her eyes, in her face, in her body. Did you hear it, her eyes were asking. Do you think Mrs. Bender noticed? What about the the rest of them. Do you think they heard it? She was being brave, consummate, strong. I smiled, proud and winked at her. You did good. I didn't bring it up, never even hinted.
We've signed a contract, Zoë and I. Ninety minutes a week. It's usually more but never less. We gave our word and must honor that. It's not easy what with the numerous directions we are pulled on any given day. But you would think just 15 minutes a day would be a cinch. I'm hear to tell you--it's not. Miss one day and you quickly find out just how difficult a task it is. We didn't have time for 15 minutes today and you think we'll have time for 30 tomorrow? Miss two days and your time management skills become the stuff of legend. Yet, at the close of each week we are able to say with all honesty we've given our 90 minutes. We have kept our word. We practiced piano like we said we would.
For the second year now, we have opened our home serving as a guest host in the Family Recital Piano Series, one of three such scheduled events to take place during the year. Mrs. Bender, Zoë's piano instructor created the series as a way of getting the families of her students together away from the structured, formal studio atmosphere and allowing the students to showcase their hard work. It's a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon in a casual setting meeting wonderful families and listening to some fantastic kids showcase some extraordinary talents.
Zoë had worked extra hard to prepare her pieces for the recital and could not have been more excited. Add to the mix that she got to wear a new dress and the enthusiasm was scarcely containable. She was ready. And she played beautifully. But it did happen. During one of her songs there was an extra note, a fumbled finger, an extra pause. She didn't stop, never quit smiling and took her bow and applause with the grace of a seasoned performer. But she knew she had made the mistake and it was eating away at her on the inside. I made no mention of it, never even hinted.
The rest of the day was without incident. Laughter, food, games and good conversation filled the house. Zoë even won one of the games and as a reward received a huge Hershey's bar. Without prompting she immediately divided the whole thing and gave a piece to all in attendance. After everyone had left, the kids and I relaxed for the remainder of the evening enjoying leftover treats and punch. Before heading off to bed, everyone chipped in and helped me clean up. Truly, a banner day. As I tucked the kids into bed and said my good nights I told them all that they were very good today and thanked them for all of their help during the recital. Zoë at long last opened up saying, "Yeah, but I messed up a little bit on my song."
"Zoë, you made me proud today. I think you did a fantastic job and you played beautifully. I loved it!"
I could see immediately that the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders. She had been set free, realizing in that instant that it's OK to not be perfect. That sometimes it's alright to make a mistake. That Daddy will still love you. She is an amazing little girl and I am honored, privileged to say that she is my daughter. And a pretty darn good pianist.
We've signed a contract, Zoë and I. Ninety minutes a week. It's usually more but never less. We gave our word and must honor that. It's not easy what with the numerous directions we are pulled on any given day. But you would think just 15 minutes a day would be a cinch. I'm hear to tell you--it's not. Miss one day and you quickly find out just how difficult a task it is. We didn't have time for 15 minutes today and you think we'll have time for 30 tomorrow? Miss two days and your time management skills become the stuff of legend. Yet, at the close of each week we are able to say with all honesty we've given our 90 minutes. We have kept our word. We practiced piano like we said we would.
For the second year now, we have opened our home serving as a guest host in the Family Recital Piano Series, one of three such scheduled events to take place during the year. Mrs. Bender, Zoë's piano instructor created the series as a way of getting the families of her students together away from the structured, formal studio atmosphere and allowing the students to showcase their hard work. It's a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon in a casual setting meeting wonderful families and listening to some fantastic kids showcase some extraordinary talents.
Zoë had worked extra hard to prepare her pieces for the recital and could not have been more excited. Add to the mix that she got to wear a new dress and the enthusiasm was scarcely containable. She was ready. And she played beautifully. But it did happen. During one of her songs there was an extra note, a fumbled finger, an extra pause. She didn't stop, never quit smiling and took her bow and applause with the grace of a seasoned performer. But she knew she had made the mistake and it was eating away at her on the inside. I made no mention of it, never even hinted.
The rest of the day was without incident. Laughter, food, games and good conversation filled the house. Zoë even won one of the games and as a reward received a huge Hershey's bar. Without prompting she immediately divided the whole thing and gave a piece to all in attendance. After everyone had left, the kids and I relaxed for the remainder of the evening enjoying leftover treats and punch. Before heading off to bed, everyone chipped in and helped me clean up. Truly, a banner day. As I tucked the kids into bed and said my good nights I told them all that they were very good today and thanked them for all of their help during the recital. Zoë at long last opened up saying, "Yeah, but I messed up a little bit on my song."
"Zoë, you made me proud today. I think you did a fantastic job and you played beautifully. I loved it!"
I could see immediately that the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders. She had been set free, realizing in that instant that it's OK to not be perfect. That sometimes it's alright to make a mistake. That Daddy will still love you. She is an amazing little girl and I am honored, privileged to say that she is my daughter. And a pretty darn good pianist.
Good job Ed!
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Love the positive message, but I wonder does Zoe think it's worth the effort to keep up piano lessons? Hard to know if she could answer honestly at her age, but what do you think? Does she play piano for herself or for you?
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Funny thing is, she approached us about taking piano lessons so it's always been a no pressure sort of thing. She loves it and we really work hard at keeping the lessons and her practices fun. She's got an uncanny ability to replicate melodies and tunes after hearing them just a couple of times. I've always told my kids when it comes to any of their extra curricular activities--Rule #1--HAVE FUN!
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That was a very touching post - especially for me. I can't even tell you how many times I was in Zoe's position - and you were absolutely right that she was probably thinking about it all day. I know the exact thing she was feeling. Great insight Ed and nicely written.
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Sometimes I think we take for granted the resiliency of our children. She tried her best during the performance and had fun which is all I ever really ask of my kids. Today, the recital is a far distant memory except for the dress which she has asked 5 times when she gets to wear again.
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That was very beautiful. I love how she divided up the Hersey bar without prompting. Thanks for sharing
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This was a beautiful post! And I identify with you so much about the 15 minutes thing. It is so hard to give the time to all the kids, so hard!
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Aw! I love that! If only we could do that for them always.
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Zoe gets it. Good job, Ed.
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Okay, are you trying to make me cry or something??? Your pride just shines through this fantastic post.
And to Zoe: EVERYONE makes mistakes, seasoned professionals who have played their compositions numerous times will often hit the wrong key, play the wrong note. It's all a part of being human... and realizing NO ONE is perfect.
Bravo Zoe!!!!
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Man, what a great story. I too have a daughter in the piano scene. I am not musical and can't practice with her, but her recitals make me sick to my stomach, I get sooo nervouse for her. I picture this the whole time I read your story. Great work brother. I loved it. She has a great friend and dad and she will be stronger because of that. Peace!
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Great for Zoe! I took piano lessons and hated the practicing.
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